I was so exhausted last night that the sensible thing would have been to go to bed when I reached a stopping point at 8:30. But, after two days off, I wanted really badly to get another recording online. So, I recorded. And it sucked.
I didn’t hate all of it; just the frequent mistakes and the long periods of coasting. And the beat — a bad choice given the mood of the night. I just wasn’t feeling it. But I was aware that there were strong points here and there; perhaps something could be salvaged from those. And so, when I finished, the great internal debate began: post it? Edit it and post it? Or just abandon it altogether?
My goal is to present the process, not a product. I’m documenting the music that appears when I sit down and invite it to appear, not trying to create perfect songs (though it’s neat when those spontaneously appear). Sometimes at the beginning I screw up the length of the loop so badly that I’ll allow myself the luxury of starting over. But once I’m genuinely underway, there’s a continuity with which I prefer not to tamper, for better or for worse. So, other than false starts, the only thing I’ll snip out is dead air, to leave only a few seconds between talking and music. I’ll bring the levels up, maybe compress it a bit, but that’s the extent of the editing I’m willing to do. I want a decent presentation; I want to put my best foot forward. But I don’t want to pretend it’s a perfect foot every night.
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